razorsaw: (FUCKIN YAY!)
So, I decided I'd start to introduce my various City of Heroes characters and their backgrounds. Here's five that I worked on today. Note that I have a lot of alts, so this may take a while...

Presenting Electrocutiona, Countess Chrona, Mekangaroo, Calamity the Kid, and the Nemean Chimera )

Edit 1 - Updated with Tawnya Lyons, Scarlet Firebug, Fossa Fatale, and Cap'n Super Dracula
razorsaw: (Armada Megatron)
So to kick things off, I thought I'd tell you guys what I'm working on as far as writing goes. These are all fan-fiction projects:

Transformers Animated: Pros & Cons: Finally going to finish this. It tells the story of Swindle after the events of the episode "Decepticon Air" and his run in with criminals, low-lives, and a certain group called the Wreckers.

Transformers Animated: Expanded Universe: All stories to come after "Pros and Cons", set in my vision of the Transformers Animated universe. I'm starting over fresh with my stories with that as the starting point, and revising the story points I used in my earlier stories "Return to Cybertron" and "The Sincerest Form of Flattery", which are now non-canonical to my stories.

Digimon Zone: An original series based on the Digimon franchise. In this series, the Digital World is an on-line community where Digimon exist as personal companions for human users. However, a young boy named Okamoto Tadaharu and his partner Rebelmon are about to discover things aren't quite what they seem...

Digimon Cross Tamers: An alternate take on the multi-season crossover concept being hinted at in the current Digimon series. While battling a digimon, Yuu, Tagiru, and Taiki are drawn into a strange phenomenon that puts them in a world they've never seen before, with people they've never met. Old villains return to play a game with our heroes, but what is the truth behind this unprecedented meeting?

Various Digimon Projects with [personal profile] mugennoken: I can't get into specifics, but he and I have some plans for this fandom cooking up in our heads. :) I hope you'll enjoy them when we release them.

The Spectacular Spider-man - Season 3: This needs a better title. In general, a continuation of the series that was cancelled before its time, drawing on plot threads that were left dangling and building up new ones.

And finally...

An original Sentai series conceived by me. In the Kingdom of Albion, five knights from the Crimson, Azure, Rose, Jade, and Amber Kingdoms unite to fight the Dark Kingdom, who are beginning to encroach upon our world. Fighting ith the power of their Heraldic Beasts, they are the Knight Task Force Braveranger!

And that's what I have coming down the pipe. :)
razorsaw: (Default)
So this is the first entry of my new Dreamwidth journal. Just letting everyone know who I am... my name is James, I'm 26 years young, and an avid fan of Transformers, Sonic the Hedgehog, Mega Man, Digimon, and many many more things.

I like to write and role-play, and hope to be a professional author some day.

Look forward to using this new community. My name over at Livejournal is [personal profile] razorsaw, same as it is here.

Please note that everything before this entry was imported from Livejournal.
razorsaw: (*angst angst angst*)
I learned today that my great aunt Delphine has cancer. She's done a lot for me, and she may lose her life to the same disease that took my grandma.

As if the chance of losing her weren't enough, I don't know if I can handle losing someone else to this...

The odds are in her favor, and the doctors' outlook is optimistic, but I'm still scared. I don't know how to handle this...

I just.

razorsaw: (... with broken wings)
Today I received word that my great aunts' cat was hit by a car.

His name was Buffy. He was a proud, long-lived cat, who had lived for a very long time. So long, that I remember growing up, and seeing Buffy whenever I visited my aunts at their home. He was part of my childhood, part of my siblings' childhood... part of our family.

Buffy was somewhat aloof, but he was also self reliant, strong, and determined. When his constant companion Blackie died several years ago, he would come to be an older brother to my aunts' new cat, Prince. Prince never really replaced Blackie for Buffy or my aunts, but they accepted him as part of the family.

Buffy was also self reliant, and prowled my aunts' large yard, keeping the local cats' and the moles that afflicted our aunts' yard in line. He was an outside cat, but he always returned to their porch faithfully. He was a cat that didn't always like to be petted, but somehow you always got the impression he saw you as an equal.

Goodbye Buffy. You were, and always will be, part of my family.
razorsaw: (Default)
Transformers Animated
Return to Cybertron
Chapter 02 - Shadow Walk

Written By: Razorsaw

To deny fate is to walk in darkness. )
razorsaw: (Default)

Hey all, just making my first post via my iPhone. Looks like everything works well!


Posted via LiveJournal.app.

razorsaw: (... with broken wings)
... my dad is in the hospital.

It's just appendicitis, but he's having surgery done.

And dad is at risk of complications at times like that, even if it's routine.

*fret fret fret*
razorsaw: (Haters Gonna Hate)
So Sega puts up a contest about which characters will be in the upcoming Sonic game, codenamed "Project Needlemouse." Each day they countdown, taking characters off one by one.

Everyone freaks out! Because obviously Sega is up to their old tricks putting lots of characters in their games apparently.

The final post comes out, and Sonic is the only one on the list.

The entire Sonic fandom just got trolled.

Couldn't have happened to a nicer bunch.
razorsaw: (Armada Optimus @#$%ing Prime)

Cad Bane is now a Transformer.


Oh my god

Jan. 13th, 2010 06:32 pm
razorsaw: (Default)
Oh my god.

Repede's outfit.

Oh my god.
razorsaw: (Default)
So I'm gonna try and put in more writing and reviews and stuff in this journal. It's time for Raz's Best of/Favorites of 2009!

And it's only ten days late. )

That's my list everybody! I hope you had some joy reading it. XD And remember, accentuate the positive. Don't... and you become the Sonic the Hedgehog fandom.
razorsaw: (Default)
Transformers: The War for Cybertron trailer from IGN.

Good god that's amazing.
razorsaw: (Shooting Star Program)
... I guess I need to get some things off my chest.

There's been... been two things I've been letting hold me back over the years. A number of things. And... I dunnow. I'm not looking to be psychoanalyzed. This is just my own understanding.

Part of it's always been my reaction to cruelty when I was a child. The kinds of things you see on TV about bullying... it's not like what you see in real life. Bullies are often decent, smart kids who get good grades, don't have any insecurities, and just think being cruel is cool. And all boys... they treat each other badly. Maybe it's a masculine way of preparing yourself for adulthood. I always reacted badly, though. I always recoiled in fear, allowed myself to be a victim... maybe in some ways I brought it upon myself. Maybe somewhere along the line, I started believing in the things they were saying about me. I know my weight gain started around eighth grade. I was always heavy, but... I became even more of one.

Either way... It produced this constantly self doubting mess that I am often. I was often times afraid of showing who I really was, and what I was really thinking. I was never assertive enough to not so much be the person I was, but to be the person I always wanted to be.

And the internet... it allowed me to cast off who I really was. To hide behind a facade, and to explore things that I couldn't in real life. I became one of those people who lied about their history on the internet, used others to form friendships. Relationships. There was someone I grew close to, but someone I liked too. I was in the Sonic fandom - my first fandom - running with a crew of rpers. And I was stupid and made the most blatant gary stu like character of all time. And I would tell all of these people, that one person, fake stories about me and what I was really like, while parading around on alternate identities and making an ass of myself.

I ended up stopping it, and hiding from it. This person... they tried to contact me. But I ignored them. I left without saying anything. I couldn't be truthful about who I really was.

The other thing. Meh. It's no secret by now, as it relates to Dive and something that went down not too long ago. Chances are you know what I'm talking about this by reading it. It involved tensions with someone else, and conflict with a group of people surrounding them. And I've bottled it up, out of fear of offending someone and opening up this huge can of worms that I've supposedly so precariously hidden.

I'm not trying to dredge it up again. But I've lived in fear of how people see me... well, all my god damned life. And in some cases, maybe there are bad things to see. I need to accept this, and move on. But...

Dive. Dive is not that first group of friends that I had when I first found fandom. First found the internet. I am who I am with these people, and I have either strengthened existing friendships or made new ones. Ones that I will cherish forever. That is why I am PROUD, PROUD to call Dive my family, and I always will be. Just as I've met people I will always cherish through Drama Drama Duck, or Jump City Nexus, or the Nexus, even if fate has made us grow apart. And yes, I even cherish the person I've come in conflict with in the past. I'm not naming names, but I'm finally able to say that I forgive him.

And I'm finally able to say... that I'm not feeling guilty anymore. Whatever problems I may have, or my endeavors may have, I will try to correct them, and fight for them. Because I am not what someone says about me. I am not that pathetic person who broke someone's heart.

I am James Backes. I have my own opinions and ways of doing things. I weigh five hundred pounds. I am insecure, and trying to recover from this. I have asperger's. I am also Razorsaw, formerly Raptorscribe, formerly Ixe the Hedgehog. I roleplay a lot of people, and I am not ashamed. I want to be a writer someday. I often bitch about fandom, more than is healthy. I do not need to be psychoanalyzed, I am happy with what I am doing. And I refuse to hold anything back, ESPECIALLY if it affects my performance in life, like it has been doing.

Because I've been holding this back for months. Years. And I need to stay at this stage, where I'm ready to acknowledge what I've done, and to accept myself.

I don't know... I don't know if this is the breakthrough I've needed. But this is something I've needed.

I won't lie. I came close to seriously hurting myself. And I'm disgusted about it. But I think... I think I've escaped that now.

I need my friends now more than ever. But more importantly, I need to know that I'm worth it. And to be strong. And to know I can be strong.

This is my new year's resolution.

This is my new beginning.

And I know I have what it takes.
razorsaw: (*angst angst angst*)
I don't know what to do. I've messed up everything I've tried to do lately. I feel like I'm at the end of my rope.

Like I don't want to keep on going.

I'm scared.

I just. I don't know if I'm worth it even to myself anymore.

I'm so god damned scared...
razorsaw: (Default)
Meme yanked from Car and Ari.

wheeee! )
razorsaw: (Vector Prime)
Holiday love meme, heh

*hopes this isn't too egotistical*
razorsaw: (Omega the Janitor)
I don't know if I've stated this before, but I have a condition known as sleep apnea. It causes me to stop breathing while I'm asleep, which causes me to sleep inefficiently, keeps me from dreaming properly, and... other things. I'm not as read up on it, but that's neither here nor there.

But anyway. My point. I started on a CPAP last night, which is a breathing machine, after getting approved for it last week after my sleep study. I had had one before, but... the thing was intolerable and I would often remove the headset during the night. So I foolishly ignored it, and the thing fell into disuse. This new one has a different mask, and is much more comfortable to wear.

I didn't pull it off even once, and when I woke up? I felt more refreshed and rested than I have in a long, long time.

It's gonna take some getting used to, but for the first time, I feel like I'm getting to a real change. ^^


razorsaw: (Default)
James "Razorsaw" Backes

April 2012

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